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Annual Death March of Deathly Death

Page history last edited by Cleolinda 15 years, 6 months ago

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The annual "In Memoriam" montage at the Oscars or, by extension, any other awards show. Inevitably, people forget (or refuse) to hold their applause until the end, leading to what's essentially a death-off to see which deceased is the most popular.

 

Ah, here's Yo Yo Ma with some classical music for the Annual Death March of Deathly Death. REMEMBER NOT TO CLAP UNTIL IT'S ALL OVER, KIDS.

George Clooney is back to present a surprisingly short Death Roll this year. Sadly, everyone claps through it like always. Anne Bancroft beats Shelley Winters by a nose.

Samuel L. Jackson! It's the In Memoriam section, and I have to say, Samuel L. Jackson is the absolute best person to present it, because in my dreams he would totally break that shit down. "DO NOT! APPLAUD! UNTIL! THE DEAD PEOPLE ARE OVER! CLAP AGAIN, MOTHERFUCKER! I DARE YOU! CLAP AGAIN!" As it is, I think Shelley Winters wins the Dead March Applause Derby--no, wait, John Spencer. Teresa Wright? Anne Bancroft? Vincent Schiavelli? Even Richard Pryor? All y'all can go screw. "DON'T MAKE ME COME DOWN THERE!"

 

2008 Hates Us

For some reason, 2008 was a banner year for major celebrity deaths, to the point where it seemed like every weekend, the year 2008 was going to find yet another way to horrify the general public. And this is not even counting dramatic near-death escapes by Morgan Freeman and Travis Barker and DJ AM. Major celebrity deaths included but were not limited to (in rough chronological order):

 

 

And for every person I listed here, there's two I didn't have tagged entries for. Damn.

 

See also

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