The Happening in Fifteen Minutes

Olympic Suicide Relay, Philadelphia

TREES: *rustle ominously*

(And with a starter shot to the forehead of the traffic cop theyyyyyy're off! The gun is passing down the line of stalled cars--nice hand-off from the guy in sandals to the businesswoman! Look at the speed on those suicide victims, this must be a new world record! They're going for the GOOOOOLD!)